He hits me. I know he loves me
No man should hit a woman
I've only ever laid my hand on a woman once in my life. I was
about 6 or 7 years old. All she did was follow me around, and I was not having
it. When we met again as adults, she looked so good, I would have been proud if
she followed me around now. Jokes aside. I find it really amusing that I
remember such an ancient occasion, which I could have easily justified on
account of my age. After all, I was only 6 or 7. The reason that this has not
left me is because I recognise that this is unacceptable at any level. I am yet
to have kids, but when I do, my son will know the value of women a tender age.
He will see how I treat his mother, and know that the same is expected of him.
No matter how awesome your man is, he has no right to lay a hand on you,
regardless of what you have done.
Defence
It's sad that most
battered women always have a way to defend their man. I cant say I understand
it, but I can definitely see why that would be. Perhaps you are staying with
him because of the children. To that I say, the more you allow your children to
be subjected to that sort of violence, the more they are likely to bring this
into their own lives. Your little girl may grow with a venomous hatred for men.
You boy may begin to think that this is the way women are kept in check. By
staying with a man who hits you, you are not doing your children any favours.
As a matter of fact you are placing them in danger, now and in the
future.
Threats
When you are
harmed, threats become more and more significant when they are said to you.
Most abusive men threaten to kill the wife and children if she tries to run
away. Yet by staying she is already dying inside. Not only is she already
dying, she is killing her children inside, and this cycle can be carried into
the next generation.
You are a queen
I just want to
remind every woman out there, you are a QUEEN. No matter what you have been
through, the fact that you carry a womb makes you royalty. You can bear kings.
As such you should know your value. Understand what you are worth. Do not
accept any treatment that goes below that standard. I need you to be strong
today. I need you to take a stand today. Whatever you refuse to accept, your
daughters and sons are also more inclined to refuse to accept. If you would not
accept that their father has a right to hit you, they will also refuse that in
their own relationships.
If you are not
married and the guy already treats you this way, that's a red flag. Leave him
now. It will not get easier. Don't let him fool you into staying under the
pretence that he will get better. A lion will not become a mouse after it has
become married. Wait for a man who knows that you are a gem, and treats you as
such.
The only man who
should discipline you is your father, even for him fists are not acceptable. He
would not discipline you in ways that hurt you, or ways that scar you. He
disciplines you in love. If your boyfriend or husband hits you, he does not
deserve such a gem as you. Liberate him. Liberate yourself.
As always hit me in the comment box below or on our Ask the expertpage. See you in the next post
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